{"id":1137,"date":"2025-07-08T05:46:01","date_gmt":"2025-07-08T04:46:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/?p=1137"},"modified":"2025-07-08T05:46:01","modified_gmt":"2025-07-08T04:46:01","slug":"suicide-self-harm-reflection","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/07\/08\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/","title":{"rendered":"Suicide &#038; Self Harm (Reflection)"},"content":{"rendered":"<span class=\"span-reading-time rt-reading-time\" style=\"display: block;\"><span class=\"rt-label rt-prefix\">Reading Time: <\/span> <span class=\"rt-time\"> 2<\/span> <span class=\"rt-label rt-postfix\">minutes<\/span><\/span><p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Suicide and self-harm is a big part of my story too. The first direct attempt I made on my life was at about the age of twenty. Somedays I feel like I want to die and some days I don\u2019t. I went through a phase of self-harm too but in recent times I haven\u2019t cut myself. I don\u2019t see the point in self-harming anymore, I would have a preference to just taking my life. It\u2019s a horrible thing that just became an obsessive part of my journey. I don\u2019t believe I ever tried to kill myself sober, I simply wouldn\u2019t have the balls to do it. In recent years my \u2018suicide attempts\u2019 would be classed as risky behaviours. I could climb onto the Salmon Weir bridge and use it as a tightrope. I could jump into the river only to swim back out. In a lot of ways I became addicted to gambling with my life. I am heavily influenced too by Tuesdays with Morrie and the faithful &amp; unfaithful departed. The moral I personally took from Tuesdays with Morrie is that everybody has to die, it\u2019s the one thing guaranteed in life. A normal person would take the moral to this story as living everyday like it is your last. I have had a lot of friends, my ex boss, my Dad die from suicide. In my teens I saw it as a selfish way to die, in my twenties I began to have compassion for those who passed through life this way. Personally I\u2019ve tried living and it hasn\u2019t worked out, I would have no regrets taking my life in the morning. One of the main reasons I came to Cuan Mhuire is because I have no fear anymore. I don\u2019t fear death nor do I fear addiction.\u00a0 It has become part of my identity. Maybe I was lost coming here, I hope by giving myself time I find the will to live life in the present, to forget the past yet not shut the door on it and learn to look forward to the future without huge or little expectation. My suicidality is something I need to look at though. As I have mentioned before I\u2019m like \u2018the boy who cried wolf\u2019 at this stage. I\u2019ve become dependent on the adult acute mental health unit to bring me back to sanity. I often wonder too if I\u2019m doing it for attention. I wonder if I am being selfish using up hours of doctors, guards, nurses and paramedics time.\u00a0 One way or another it has to stop. Whether that\u2019s through suicide or living sober, that is yet to be decided.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p><span class=\"span-reading-time rt-reading-time\" style=\"display: block;\"><span class=\"rt-label rt-prefix\">Reading Time: <\/span> <span class=\"rt-time\"> 2<\/span> <span class=\"rt-label rt-postfix\">minutes<\/span><\/span>Suicide and self-harm is a big part of my story too. The first direct attempt I made on my life was at about the age of twenty. Somedays I feel like I want to die and some days I don\u2019t. I went through a phase of self-harm too but in ...<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":920,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[51,63,62],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1137","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-flashback","category-mentalhealth","category-reflections"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v26.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Suicide &amp; Self Harm (Reflection) - Sober.ie V1.3<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"One way or another it has to stop. Whether that\u2019s through suicide or living sober, that is yet to be decided.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Suicide &amp; Self Harm (Reflection) - Sober.ie V1.3\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"One way or another it has to stop. Whether that\u2019s through suicide or living sober, that is yet to be decided.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Sober.ie V1.3\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2025-07-08T04:46:01+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/Blog-Small-Large-5.png\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1240\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"827\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Shanley\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@#\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Shanley\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"3 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Shanley\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#\/schema\/person\/3722c2ea24643db39df2442d10d25025\"},\"headline\":\"Suicide &#038; Self Harm (Reflection)\",\"datePublished\":\"2025-07-08T04:46:01+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/\"},\"wordCount\":460,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/Blog-Small-Large-5.png\",\"articleSection\":[\"Flashback\",\"Mental Health\",\"Reflections\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/\",\"name\":\"Suicide & Self Harm (Reflection) - Sober.ie V1.3\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/Blog-Small-Large-5.png\",\"datePublished\":\"2025-07-08T04:46:01+00:00\",\"description\":\"One way or another it has to stop. Whether that\u2019s through suicide or living sober, that is yet to be decided.\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/Blog-Small-Large-5.png\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/Blog-Small-Large-5.png\",\"width\":1240,\"height\":827},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Suicide &#038; Self Harm (Reflection)\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/\",\"name\":\"Sober.ie V1.0\",\"description\":\"Happy Living\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#organization\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Organization\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#organization\",\"name\":\"Sober.ie\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/\",\"logo\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/SoberLogo.png\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/SoberLogo.png\",\"width\":300,\"height\":100,\"caption\":\"Sober.ie\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\"}},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#\/schema\/person\/3722c2ea24643db39df2442d10d25025\",\"name\":\"Shanley\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/dbbd30e52f8734dde1221b7df7cf0c5bab6216912a29b6af1fe6f9268c6f7277?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/dbbd30e52f8734dde1221b7df7cf0c5bab6216912a29b6af1fe6f9268c6f7277?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"Shanley\"},\"description\":\"Twenty Five Years of Addiction Sums Me Up\",\"sameAs\":[\"https:\/\/sober.ie\",\"#\",\"https:\/\/x.com\/#\"],\"url\":\"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/author\/conor-shanley\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Suicide & Self Harm (Reflection) - Sober.ie V1.3","description":"One way or another it has to stop. Whether that\u2019s through suicide or living sober, that is yet to be decided.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Suicide & Self Harm (Reflection) - Sober.ie V1.3","og_description":"One way or another it has to stop. Whether that\u2019s through suicide or living sober, that is yet to be decided.","og_url":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/","og_site_name":"Sober.ie V1.3","article_published_time":"2025-07-08T04:46:01+00:00","og_image":[{"width":1240,"height":827,"url":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/Blog-Small-Large-5.png","type":"image\/png"}],"author":"Shanley","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@#","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"Shanley","Est. reading time":"3 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/"},"author":{"name":"Shanley","@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#\/schema\/person\/3722c2ea24643db39df2442d10d25025"},"headline":"Suicide &#038; Self Harm (Reflection)","datePublished":"2025-07-08T04:46:01+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/"},"wordCount":460,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#organization"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/Blog-Small-Large-5.png","articleSection":["Flashback","Mental Health","Reflections"],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/","url":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/","name":"Suicide & Self Harm (Reflection) - Sober.ie V1.3","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/Blog-Small-Large-5.png","datePublished":"2025-07-08T04:46:01+00:00","description":"One way or another it has to stop. Whether that\u2019s through suicide or living sober, that is yet to be decided.","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#primaryimage","url":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/Blog-Small-Large-5.png","contentUrl":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/Blog-Small-Large-5.png","width":1240,"height":827},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/2025\/06\/11\/suicide-self-harm-reflection\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Suicide &#038; Self Harm (Reflection)"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#website","url":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/","name":"Sober.ie V1.0","description":"Happy Living","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#organization"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#organization","name":"Sober.ie","url":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/SoberLogo.png","contentUrl":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/SoberLogo.png","width":300,"height":100,"caption":"Sober.ie"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/"}},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#\/schema\/person\/3722c2ea24643db39df2442d10d25025","name":"Shanley","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/dbbd30e52f8734dde1221b7df7cf0c5bab6216912a29b6af1fe6f9268c6f7277?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/dbbd30e52f8734dde1221b7df7cf0c5bab6216912a29b6af1fe6f9268c6f7277?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"Shanley"},"description":"Twenty Five Years of Addiction Sums Me Up","sameAs":["https:\/\/sober.ie","#","https:\/\/x.com\/#"],"url":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/author\/conor-shanley\/"}]}},"featured_image":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/03\/Blog-Small-Large-5.png","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1137","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1137"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1137\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1138,"href":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1137\/revisions\/1138"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/920"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1137"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1137"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sober.ie\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1137"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}